Forced Hate. Fake Love.

We all have an inner hater inside of us. For some, it’s buried in the very darkest pit of the heart and exists as a spec. For the rest of us, it’s triggered by the very mention of Chris Brown’s name. 

Loving to hate is such a pure feeling! It brings me joy and happiness.

 But I fear society has taken it too far when discussing things we hate and things we love. 

As a non-practising intellectual, I have diagnosed the entire human race with an incredibly complex disease, which scientist have called F.A.B. If you are reading this, I am incredibly sorry to break the news to you that you in fact suffer from being a fake ass b*tch. Sorrows, sorrows prayers. 

If you’re going to hate something, do it with CHEST! And have a valid reason. Nothing is more embarrassing than seeing people joining a bandwagon and hating something or someone without a valid reason. It’s giving sheep. 

Love is love but there are things I KNOW you are all pretending to love.  

So, with the power vested in me by the spirit of the Queen of Haters Ms Wendy Williams, I give to you my list of things and people society hates to love and things and people I believe we all pretend to love.

Love to Hate: 

Method acting

We ALL pretend to hate it when actor gives a role their all, immersing themselves into the world of the character their playing. I LOVE IT. I eat that shit UP. It’s so funny to me. You mean to tell me, Austin Butler was ordering a skinny iced white mocha with no whipped cream sounding like THE Elvis Presley?! Or that Lady Gaga was rehearsing for the Chromatica World Tour with the Italian accent she used in “House of Gucci”? People think method acting is stupid, I personally think more actors should do it.  

I need Leonardo DiCaprio to play an older male actor who only dates women his age, method acting would work well for the role, he should try dating women over 40 to really connect with the character.

Meg Thee Stallion 

Meg deserves the biggest hug and apology in the entire world. In the space of 3 years, she was thrust into stardom, lost both her parents and grandmother, was shot, was locked in a bitter dispute with her management and record label and had the entire world turn their backs on her. It’s protect black women all day, every day. Megan was branded a liar and had memes created about her making fun of her trauma. Thankfully, the tide is turning, the balding leprechaun who shot her and led a smear campaign against Meg is rotting in prison and Meg has gone independent, releasing a new self-funded single titled ‘Cobra’ (go stream!). I will always root for talent and only hope the rest of her life is filled with success and happiness. 

Beyoncé

I know what you’re thinking, why is Beyoncé on this list? Well, this is aimed at the people who claim she is overrated and not that talented. Let me tell you something. There is no one as hardworking as Queen B. She is the blueprint. The greatest living entertainer and I do not mess around when it comes to Beyonce. Beyoncé is your favourite artist’s favourite artist so put some respect on her name. 

Madison Beer

The hate Madison Beer receives is INSANE. It all stems from the fact that she’s stunning. I have seen people on Beyoncé’s internet tweet about how she’s boring because she’s pretty... 

Face card is so valid that she receives hate for simply existing. Not everyone pop star needs facially challenged. Not every pop star needs a struggle story about how they were bullied in school. GIVE US THE UNATTAINABLE BEAUTY STANDARD. It’s not everyday ‘Scars to your beautiful’. The girlies need to get over it. Yes Madison is the beauty standard but what do you want her to do about it? Madison seems genuinely sweet, is beautiful and has immense talent. I smell a Grammy nomination coming her way and it will be well deserved.

Ed Sheeran 

I will never understand the hate Ed Sheeran receives on the internet. Yes, I know his music isn't to everyone's taste but ‘’+” is a goated album.

Also, for the gingers and lowkey racists who were hating on Halle Bailey after she was cast as the Little Mermaid, Ed Sheeran and Chucky are the ginger representation that you have all been begging for. 

Ariana Grande 

As you know I will always root for talent, Ariana Grande that means I got you boo! The internet does this weird thing where they hear a crazy and UNCONFIRMED RUMOUR and start with the ‘I’ve never liked her’.

GET BEHIND ME ARI!

Which is crazy to me. Everyone and their mothers, suddenly has an opinion on Ariana’s personal life, calling her every misogynistic and sexist name under the sun.  She can do no wrong in my eyes. Come to me once you’ve released 3 back to back albums of pop perfection.

Fake Love:

Drake 

The BBL Bandit. If you can’t find him in the studio he’s probably in the business of women and in the dms of underage girls. My dislike for him stems from his inability to rap about women in a positive and poetic way. Instead, he chooses to fund his lavish lifestyle by dissing women. Drake unfortunately released multiple albums in his career (I know, hasn’t humanity been through enough). One particular album contains lyrics that refer to Megan Thee Stallion as a ‘clout chaser’, suggesting she lied about being sh*t. In 2023, he plagued us with more misogyny and disregard for women, using an image of Halle Berry without her permission as the cover for his single ‘Slime You Out’. Somehow, he is more popular than ever, topping charts and booking in for lymphatic massages to maintain the BBL BAWDY. A BBL sponsored by misogyny.  

Just know I’m waiting for his career downfall. 

Friends: 

RIP to Matthew Perry. I promise this was sitting in my drafts WEEKS before his passing. I’m going to say what we are all too scared to say. ‘Friends’ is the most overrated show in history. Please call me a hater I LIVE FOR IT! The show is not funny and did not age well with the racist and transphobic jokes. Let me not SPEAK about the lack of representation...

Movies over 2 hours long

BRING BACK SHORTER MOVIES! I’m sorry, I can no longer sit through long movies. Why do we need two hours of Peter Parker swinging from place to place. Don’t get me wrong, I am a woman of culture and I love a cheeky historical drama. I can appreciate film as an art form. But I also suffer with a weak bladder. 

Me watching all 80 parts of Martin Socerece’s 10-time Academy Award Nominated cinematic masterpiece “The Irishman” on TikTok with a game of Subway surfers playing on the top of the screen.  

Tiffany Haddish 

Anytime I see Tiffany Haddish, the second-hand embarrassment is STRONG. Someone needs to sit her down and tell her she does not need to embarrass herself or overly sexualise to make people laugh. People might argue they have a dislike for her, so who is watching her movies then? Why does she continue to plague our screens?

Matty Healy 

I have an extremely low opinion of Matty Healy (check out the piece I did on nepo babies). A terrible, racist and Islamophobic man. A lot of people publicly dislike him but someone is still out there streaming his music and paying his bills. He fits into the grey area; people pretend to hate him but are sneaking off to his concerts to be spit on by him. Just nasty.

I don’t even want to think about what one of his concerts must smell like.  

Colleen Hoover books 

Collen Hoover’s readership is made up of the girlies who were sheltered as teens and are having their Wattpad phase in adulthood. Yikes.  

Fanfiction 

If you have ever written a fanfiction you need to be institutionalised and locked away for the safety of society. You are one sick individual.

Where were your parents?

You were on the internet with zero adult supervision writing smut about Harry Styles. And now you stress about whether or not the cashier has given you the correct change because YOU were too busy writing smut to do your math homework.  

If you’ve ever written a fanfic just know you're on a government watch list boo.

Donald Glover

America. America has a problem, and his name is Donald Glover. Donald Glover, I do not know what your beef with black women is, but you will pay for your crimes. As a black woman who has watched his two biggest shows: ‘Atlanta’ and ‘Swarm’ my skin crawls thinking about how his inability to depict black women as anything but caricatures in his shows. In case you're unfamiliar with his work, ‘Swarm’ starred Dominique Fishback as an overzealous stan. When preparing for the role, Donald Glover told Dominque to the think of the character as an “animal” and “less like a human.” Yay let’s promote the systematic dehumanization of Black women. In his show ‘Atlanta’, Donald was unable to represent the black female characters as more than two dimensional sketches, invoking racist and sexist stereotypes. Yet he will continue being nominated for all these awards.

Donald Glover, whenever he is told he needs to write about black women in a positive way. 

Side note: Do you guys think he was on the ‘Lion King’ set taking notes of what Beyonce was like to use for his show ‘Swarm’? I feel sick thinking about it. 

Final Thoughts:

I am not passionate about much. Except for hating.

There are a million and one things that could be added to this list but I think I have reached my daily hating limit for today. It’s good to practise mindfulness, I would recommend adopting a similar hating limit that I have implemented into my everyday life which is 23 hours out of the 24 hours we have in a day. Peace and love xox